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Jack Off the Beanstalk: An Adult Pantomime

 
Victor Black Review by Victor Black 2 Published: 28 Aug 2025 Greenside @ Riddles Court Show Dates: 11 Aug 2025-16 Aug 2025

Jack Off the Beanstalk is a reasonably fun adult pantomime, taking many of the tropes of traditional pantos and twisting them for an adult audience. As the title suggests, this is Jack and the Beanstalk reimagined, with our impoverished hero selling his cows for beans, which grow into the stalk that leads him to a world where Giant Donald Trump reigns supreme.

Lacks gravitas and the actors never quite connect with their audience

The premise could work, but the production feels amateur. The writing is weak, with streams of lazy innuendo delivered by one-dimensional characters. A couple of songs fall flat, and none of the actors truly take ownership of their roles. The strongest performance comes from a Cinderella-type character trapped in Trump’s castle, but she spends most of the show offstage and only appears ten minutes before the end. Rhyming interludes from angelic and demonic guides land fairly well, but lack gravitas, and the actors never quite connect with their audience.

The plot is coherent, and there are laughs to be had. Yet there are many missed opportunities to make it feel like an event. The classic audience interactions of “He’s behind you!” and “Oh, no, he isn’t!” are glossed over or absent, and when a loud-mouthed audience member heckled throughout, he was ignored – only to be invited onstage later.

This is not a bad show, and if the premise appeals it will entertain. But with the wealth of highbrow, thought-provoking comedy available, or even sillier shows that raise laughs without leaning on clumsy digs at Trump and the church, your time is probably better spent elsewhere.

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The Blurb:

Jack’s off, his beanstalk’s throbbing and the fairies are filthier than your browser history. When Jack trades his dried-up old cow for a handful of magic beans (and a sticky situation), he’s forced into a world of sexually frustrated giants, dodgy boy bands and celebrity geese. Expect dodgy jokes, a dodgier cast and a Dame who's been milked more than the cow she’s flogging. It’s pure panto mayhem – just dirtier, louder and with a guaranteed happy ending. Leave the kids at home.