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John Kearns: The Varnishing Days

Attending John Kearns' show, The Varnishing Days, was an absolute treat that demands to be seen! Right from his entrance, he had us hooked with his distinctive and uproarious performance.

An unmissable experience for those craving an unforgettable night

Kearns' comedic style defies conventions; a flawless fusion of gut-busting laughter and razor-sharp observations. His musings on fatherhood with a one-year-old hit the sweet spot between relatability and sidesplitting hilarity, forging an instant bond with his audience.

Transforming everyday items like bin bags and teatowels into comedic gold was pure genius. We found ourselves in fits of uncontrollable laughter at the simplest things, all thanks to Kearns' impeccable delivery and comedic timing.

Drawing parallels between his comedy and a chef unveiling a high-end restaurant was wonderfully surreal yet incredibly entertaining. He seamlessly wove this analogy throughout, leaving us spellbound by his inventiveness and wit. Beyond the laughter, Kearns generously shared valuable insights. Unexpected yet immensely appreciated, his tips on locating Van Gogh's iconic paintings seamlessly merged humour with practical knowledge.

Throughout the show, Kearns embraced the unpredictability, keeping us guessing and thoroughly entertained. His commitment and passion for delighting the audience were palpable.

The Varnishing Days is an absolute gem in the comedy world, an unmissable experience for those craving an unforgettable night of laughter and entertainment. John Kearns' show is a must-see, and we eagerly await the chance to bask in his brilliance once more!

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Reviews by Michael Benson

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★★★★★
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Since you’re here…

… we have a small favour to ask. We don't want your money to support a hack's bar bill at Abattoir, but if you have a pound or two spare, we really encourage you to support a good cause. If this review has either helped you discover a gem or avoid a turkey, consider doing some good that will really make a difference.

You can donate to the charity of your choice, but if you're looking for inspiration, there are three charities we really like.

Mama Biashara
Kate Copstick’s charity, Mama Biashara, works with the poorest and most marginalised people in Kenya. They give grants to set up small, sustainable businesses that bring financial independence and security. That five quid you spend on a large glass of House White? They can save someone’s life with that. And the money for a pair of Air Jordans? Will take four women and their fifteen children away from a man who is raping them and into a new life with a moneymaking business for Mum and happiness for the kids.
Donate to Mama Biashara now

Theatre MAD
The Make A Difference Trust fights HIV & AIDS one stage at a time. Their UK and International grant-making strategy is based on five criteria that raise awareness, educate, and provide care and support for the most vulnerable in society. A host of fundraising events, including Bucket Collections, Late Night Cabarets, West End Eurovision, West End Bares and A West End Christmas continue to raise funds for projects both in the UK and Sub-Saharan Africa.
Donate to Theatre MAD now

Acting For Others
Acting for Others provides financial and emotional support to all theatre workers in times of need through the 14 member charities. During the COVID-19 crisis Acting for Others have raised over £1.7m to support theatre workers affected by the pandemic.
Donate to Acting For Others now

Performances

Location

The Blurb

The Varnishing Days is the heart-stopping, glasses-dropping, hard-rocking, wig-shaking, levothyroxine-taking, knee-knocking, boot-licking, justifying, teeth-rattling, digressing new show from stand-up comedian to the stars John Kearns. Go silent as I walk on! Acknowledge when something funny happens! Leave discussing what you're about to do next. Others will be implicated. Points will be circled and missed. Hell, it’s a man trying his best! For money!
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Buy cheap tickets for Boozr

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