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Secret Admirers

 
Nicholas Abrams Review by Nicholas Abrams 3 Published: 27 Jul 2025 The Assembly Rooms Theatre Show Dates: 25 Jul 2025-27 Jul 2025

“Now, to students, that type of thing is probably hilarious,” quipped Caroline Aherne’s character Mrs Merton, deadpan, to Vic and Bob. That line came to mind more than once during Secret Admirers, a new musical from the Foot of the Hill Theatre Company that mixes romantic angst with a high-concept FBI surveillance comedy. It’s big, bold and faintly bonkers – and while not everything lands, there’s more than enough here to make it worth your time.

It has ideas, voices, ambition, and a slightly chaotic heart

The concept is knowingly ludicrous: everyone in the world is surveilled by a dedicated FBI agent, and two of these agents (Emma Henderson and Kian Standbridge) are tasked with nudging their awkwardly mismatched subjects, Lucy and Adam, into romance. As the human couple’s relationship sours and stalls, the agents begin to catch feelings themselves – all under the all-seeing eye of a mysterious Overseer, who is less than thrilled by these emotional developments.

The show runs on two tracks: a comic meta-spy narrative and a more grounded romantic drama. The balance isn’t always even. The FBI sequences have energy – there are gags, conspiratorial winks and some ambitious choreography – but also a heavy whiff of drama-soc silliness. There’s fourth-wall breaking, CIA-style clipboards and a good deal of postmodern mugging that occasionally tries too hard. Judging by the laughs from the student-heavy crowd, it’s hitting its mark with its target audience, even if it doesn’t always withhold from leaning on the obvious.

Where the show does shine is in the relationship between Lucy and Adam. Their story arc owes more than a little to The Last Five Years – especially in its bleaker middle stretch, when things fall apart with musical precision. There’s a better show buried just beneath the surface here: one where the central couple don’t get back together, and their unresolved emotional tangles are allowed to sit, unanswered. The “happy ending” feels unearned, as if the writers lost their nerve in the final scenes. A gutsier production might have left things unresolved – or at least less neatly tied up.

Musically, there’s a lot to like. The score, by Luke Mallon, ranges from big belt numbers to more introspective pieces, and while the lighter, comic songs are serviceable, it’s the emotional ones that truly resonate. Emma Henderson as Agent Skye gives a powerhouse performance – vocally assured and emotionally rooted – and brings much of the show’s weight with her. Standbridge, as her partner-in-surveillance, is equally engaging, while Niamh Williams as Lucy gives a warm and expressive turn.

Less successful is the choreography. The cast clearly aren’t natural dancers, and the early musical numbers suffer from awkward movement that feels like a holdover from traditional MT staging. Ironically, once the choreography is dropped midway through, everything relaxes: the cast look more at ease, the voices come forward, and the show begins to breathe.

Technically, it’s a bit of a haze – quite literally. The haze machine is left on for the duration, meaning much of the action plays out in a kind of diffuse fog. Add to that some distractingly programmed moving-head lights and it starts to feel like the tech is trying too hard to be impressive, rather than simply supporting the story.

Secret Admirers isn’t perfect – but it isn’t boring either. It has ideas, voices, ambition, and a slightly chaotic heart. With sharper direction, subtler tech and a little more trust in its quieter strengths, this could grow into something genuinely moving. For now, it’s a fun, slightly foggy and endearingly overcooked hour – with a few moments that genuinely linger.

Amir Nisi

Nicholas Abrams

Nick runs Broadway Baby's Brighton operation.

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The Blurb:

Welcome to the Bureau's Secret One-To-One Surveillance Branch, where everyone on earth is keenly surveyed by an FBI Agent! In this musical comedy, ‘Much Ado About Nothing’ meets espionage and bureaucracy, as two FBI agents help their awkward subjects fall in love, only to start catching feelings for each other in the process. Meanwhile, the Overseer watches all and doesn't like what it sees...
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