SAD! Former Legendary Pop Diva (Woman) Eliza Maroon CANCELLED For Being BITTER About FLOP CAREER And Total Lack of Mainstream Success! Faded Stars Biggest Fan (Homosexual) Gary Hayley Commits ATTEMPTED MURDER in Bid to Help Idol Reclaim Former Glory! GET TICKETS to Watch Shocking ORIGINAL PLAY About Highly Publicised Mock Murder Trial Judged By TWITTER! Will EXPOSE Problematic Views on STAN CULTURE and CELEBRITY WORSHIP and GAY MANS MISOGYNY!
