How To Pimp Your Kids and Shop For Free at Waitrose

Matthew Collins is a travel journalist and single parent, although not necessarily in that order. The title of his show is possibly misleading, as these are just two of the subjects he touches on during his 50 minute monologue at Sweet Grassmarket.

Collins is an engaging speaker, and he tells some witty anecdotes, but I can't help thinking it's all a little insubstantial to call it a “show“. Staging wise, it looked like someone had thrown a white sheet up at the end of the room onto which he projects the occasional video clip. It's a bit like watching somebody else's holiday snaps, and paying to do so.

The majority of the ground he covers is to do with holidays in America, where he has taken his two boys on several road trips, and whilst there, they have made a tidy sum busking. For reasons not fully explained, Collins found the need to take a Nanny with him to look after him and the boys, which seemed a little at odds with the spendthrift message of this show. I grew up in a paternal single parent family myself, and my father didn't seem to have much problem taking my sister and I on holiday without the need for assistance. It painted a picture of middle class poverty that I can't say I had an awful lot of sympathy for.

His flyer states any proceeds will go towards a holiday for the exploited Collins boys. Not a fund I'm particularly keen to donate to.

Reviews by Pete Shaw

Greenwich Theatre

The Queen of Hearts

★★★★★

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★★★★
The Phoenix Arts Club Facebook Live Page

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Crescent - The Vaults

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★★★★
Greenwich Theatre

Sleeping Beauty

★★★★★

Since you’re here…

… we have a small favour to ask. We don't want your money to support a hack's bar bill at Abattoir, but if you have a pound or two spare, we really encourage you to support a good cause. If this review has either helped you discover a gem or avoid a turkey, consider doing some good that will really make a difference.

You can donate to the charity of your choice, but if you're looking for inspiration, there are three charities we really like.

Mama Biashara
Kate Copstick’s charity, Mama Biashara, works with the poorest and most marginalised people in Kenya. They give grants to set up small, sustainable businesses that bring financial independence and security. That five quid you spend on a large glass of House White? They can save someone’s life with that. And the money for a pair of Air Jordans? Will take four women and their fifteen children away from a man who is raping them and into a new life with a moneymaking business for Mum and happiness for the kids.
Donate to Mama Biashara now

Theatre MAD
The Make A Difference Trust fights HIV & AIDS one stage at a time. Their UK and International grant-making strategy is based on five criteria that raise awareness, educate, and provide care and support for the most vulnerable in society. A host of fundraising events, including Bucket Collections, Late Night Cabarets, West End Eurovision, West End Bares and A West End Christmas continue to raise funds for projects both in the UK and Sub-Saharan Africa.
Donate to Theatre MAD now

Acting For Others
Acting for Others provides financial and emotional support to all theatre workers in times of need through the 14 member charities. During the COVID-19 crisis Acting for Others have raised over £600,000 to support theatre workers affected by the pandemic.
Donate to Acting For Others now

The Blurb

Single dad-on-the-edge, Matthew Collins (ex-BBC TV's 'Travel Show'), insists his kids pay their way. Enjoy candid child-rearing/travel confessions as he explains how you can make cash from YOUR kids. www.matthewcollins.co.uk

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