It is an absolute delight to be able to report that Jeremiah Smallchild and Gideon Lamb have returned to the den of iniquity, incontinence, drug-peddling and pederasty that is the Edinburgh Festival. When I saw their wholesome show last year I turned my back on wickedness and gave myself to Jesus, God praise his holy name.
Having raised £135 to save a sick child last year, these two good looking young men, (one sporting a Virginity Rocks T-shirt) have this year turned their attention to saving the entire earth (Everyone Always Really Triumphs Here). They are brave enough, through Gods beautiful gift of song, to tackle all the pressing problems of the day, including the environment, overpopulation, and, of course, women. With wholesome voices and poetic lyrics they take us through all the terrible things the devil has brought to Gods earth.
And how right they are that we should be aware of the devil. There were even sinners in the audience who seemed to be laughing at everything our righteous duo said, especially at their song about orphans which pointed out that orphans are as special as normal children. Now whats funny about that?
The devil even came amongst us in the show! As our boys tried to solve the problem of Africa through a rap song (as they point out, rap music must have started in Africa), they rowed terribly, and Jeremiah fled the building, leaving Gideon to reflect on the folly of anger and pride. We prayed they would be reunited (except for the sinners in the audience who for some reason were still laughing like the debauched citizens of Sodom and Gomorrah, may the Lord have vengeance on them!). God heard our prayer, for reunited they were. They pointed out to us we had just seen an example of how dangerous rap music can be!
If you want to avoid the filth and sleaze purveyed at The Festival under the name of so- called entertainment this is the show for you. Ignore the fact that everyone around you is laughing, and just pray to Jesus for their souls.
