Eurobeat - Almost Eurovision

There's something of an impressive atmosphere even as you queue for Eurobeat. Hawkers are selling flags and rattles and making much noise - warming up the crowd for what is to come. It's also this point that you're randomly assigned your country. Tonight I'm supporting Germany.

It's impressive how they manage to maintain the energy in the crowd. There's a real sense of being at Eurovision itself. We're in Slovakia, and it's down to the ten finalists at the Eurovision Song Contest. Terry Wogan himself introduces the show, via video link, before our hosts for the evening Boyka (Mel Giedroyc) and Sergei (Glynn Nicholas) take to the stage.

Each of the acts are extreme stereotypes of the countries they represent. Greece has a Nana Mouskouri lookalike; Germany a non-singing Kraftwerk band and Sweden serves up Abba-style. The xenophobic jingoism is hilariously funny. It's all very kitsch, and slickly played. There's obviously a very professional team at work here, but the show is stolen by Mel Giedroyc. Stunningly funny.

Eurovision fans will love the show for its authenticity. Those that abhor Eurovision will love the parody. It's brilliantly scripted, incredibly camp and stunningly well executed. The only problem with the show is that it follows Eurovision a little too faithfully, so suffers from the same niggles of the original. The songs, whilst funny at first, can get a little repetitive. The vote counting is also a little monotonous, going through the five votes of each of the ten countries. This show would really benefit from being trimmed back to an hour in length.

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Since you’re here…

… we have a small favour to ask. We don't want your money to support a hack's bar bill at Abattoir, but if you have a pound or two spare, we really encourage you to support a good cause. If this review has either helped you discover a gem or avoid a turkey, consider doing some good that will really make a difference.

You can donate to the charity of your choice, but if you're looking for inspiration, there are three charities we really like.

Mama Biashara
Kate Copstick’s charity, Mama Biashara, works with the poorest and most marginalised people in Kenya. They give grants to set up small, sustainable businesses that bring financial independence and security. That five quid you spend on a large glass of House White? They can save someone’s life with that. And the money for a pair of Air Jordans? Will take four women and their fifteen children away from a man who is raping them and into a new life with a moneymaking business for Mum and happiness for the kids.
Donate to Mama Biashara now

Theatre MAD
The Make A Difference Trust fights HIV & AIDS one stage at a time. Their UK and International grant-making strategy is based on five criteria that raise awareness, educate, and provide care and support for the most vulnerable in society. A host of fundraising events, including Bucket Collections, Late Night Cabarets, West End Eurovision, West End Bares and A West End Christmas continue to raise funds for projects both in the UK and Sub-Saharan Africa.
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Acting For Others
Acting for Others provides financial and emotional support to all theatre workers in times of need through the 14 member charities. During the COVID-19 crisis Acting for Others have raised over £600,000 to support theatre workers affected by the pandemic.
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The Blurb

Just think live Eurovision Song Contest in sunny Sarajevo. Ten countries compete, and the audience votes for the winner! 'Dazzles with kitschy brilliance ... an epically delirious hoot!'

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