Trigger warning; the following contains references to child abuse & sexual assault. Although these experiences are not described in any detail in the article, the legacies of these experiences are. Please listen to your own sense of comfort and read / stop reading accordingly.
One of the keys to this show is reassuring the audience. If I miss that moment, I don’t get the show back
Similarly, the word ‘entertainment’ is used here in the loosest possible sense of the word – that of conveying a message to an audience. At no point does any voice in this article suggest that abuse, or experiences of abuse is ‘entertaining’.
‘A taboo is a way of managing discomfort’, comedian Jonny Pelham says over the phone.
‘Sure, every couple of years, the press will chase one person, and there will be a storm. And that allows us to feel okay about ourselves, and not deal with the actual issue. That’s taboo.’
A week later I am speaking to writer and performer Alex Gwyther, who says: ‘Male rape? Yes, it’s a taboo. The people who are having discussions about it are mostly the survivors – the people who have already experienced it. It’s rarely discussed elsewhere.’
Jonny Pelham and Alex Gwyther have both performed at Edinburgh Fringe before and know their way around. Which is good, as Jonny Pelham: Off Limits, and Alex’s show, Ripped, both narrate the lived experiences of men who have been sexually assaulted.
And at the end of the day, both shows are seeking to entertain.
Jonny Pelham was abused as a child for several years and only realised in his late-twenties that this experience had impacted his ability to engage in relationships. Alex worked with abuse survivors and Survivors Manchester, in order to better understand the processes and conversations that emerge from an abusive event.
Working on the front-line of the issue, Survivors UK report that every year in the UK, 12,000 men are raped. As with sexual violence against women, many cases go underreported – Survivors UK estimate a staggering 96%. Here then, is a major question for creative communities: how do we talk about sexual abuse in our artwork?
Why tell this story?
In the writing of this article, both Jonny and Alex have
admitted to plenty of long nights agonising over how audiences will react to
their depictions of sexual abuse. For Jonny, there was a personal need to bring
his comedy routine to Edinburgh Fringe.
‘We have this idea that if you’ve been abused, you’re irrevocably fucked’
Jonny tells me this early in his interview. Survivor narratives are often focused upon the damage caused to the survivor, rather than any other quality. It is a troublesome lens by which to tell a story because it means an abused character can only grow or develop in spite of the abuse that has been done to them.
In the end, it came down to authenticity – the heart of Jonny’s previous stand-up routines was his experiences as a sexually-awkward twenty-something in the harsh and ruthless world of modern dating. Audiences loved his content but Jonny felt that he wasn’t being entirely truthful. This is because his experiences of abuse were a major influence in his attempts to find intimacy – a point that he had, until Jonny Pelham: Off Limits, neglected to include when telling his gags. This was one of many turning points.
‘I saw a load of 8-year olds playing – I saw them playing – and realised how guiltless they were. And realised that I still felt guilty.’
After a lot of personal introspection, including therapy, Jonny is now happy to share his experiences in the very forum where he once felt he was lacking full disclosure: as a comedian. Similarly, Alex felt driven to explore this issue when he was touring a play to sixth-form and colleges about sex, relationships, and consent. And one of the audience reactions alarmed him:
‘There is a male character, who delivers a monologue where he confesses to being raped by another male. And this was always met with laughter from the young men and women in the audience’
Later in workshops Alex would explore why the image of a sexually assaulted male invoked laughter as a response. After careful discussion, the cause of the reaction seemed to originate almost exclusively from perceptions of masculinity. Alex felt there was an inalienable link between ‘masculinity’ and male rape – that for many audiences, the two cannot exist in the same space – and that was worth confronting in a larger creative work, Ripped.
Sexual abuse and the problem of Audiences
‘Duncan made things a lot more real’, Alex says.
He is speaking about Duncan Craig, the CEO of Survivors Manchester, a survivor-led organisation who offer support to sexually abused men. Duncan collaborated with Alex on Ripped, as well as advised sensitive storylines on Hollyoaks and Coronation Street.
‘When Duncan said he approved of the play […] that allowed me to feel more at ease. It’s every creator’s nightmare – what if I’ve created something offensive, or which just doesn’t work?’
Many audience members - particularly those who dive into the Fringe –, understand that they will see shows that may take them outside their comfort zones. The Fringe allows audiences to test their own boundaries and engage in content that can be emotionally difficult, or very ‘real’. The elective choice an audience member makes when they take a seat is that they are going to engage with some form of ‘entertainment’. Being an audience member is a signal to creatives that you are allowing yourself to be communicated to in a theatrical space.
In interviews, both Jonny and Alex felt that winning an audience’s attention is a challenge, but not the crucial one. As seasoned performers they understand how to hold a stage. The most urgent concern was of a larger issue; the audience’s ‘stamina’.
‘How do I shape my experience, so it’s consumable and enjoyable to an audience? One of the keys to this show is reassuring the audience. If I miss it, I don’t get the show back.’
Jonny tells me this whilst outlining the problem of ‘heavy’ content. Drilling deep into a sad or depressing narrative can alienate audiences if they can’t see a light at the end of the tunnel. As a form of self-defence, audience members may – understandably – retreat into their own personal safeties. And once that has happened, it is hard to win an audience back. The theatre space becomes loaded with insecurity and uncertainty.
‘I don’t want my play to be portrayed as very heavy throughout’ Alex outlines, ‘Audiences must see something that is engaging, lightening – at times joyous.’
Jonny’s stance is similar: ‘the job of a creative is to make stuff that is entertaining. That doesn’t mean comforting – maybe my audience will get angry. But I am holding the chain and responsibility of the conversation and most importantly, I want them to LAUGH.’
Humour & Trauma
We often feel that conversations about sexual assault and child abuse should only happen in hushed tones; that these conversations belong in quiet rooms because they are serious and demand sensitivity. However, one of the most staggering aspects Alex perceived when working with abuse survivors was the role humour played in resilience and healing. Humour turns a quiet voice into a louder one. In recovery, a sense of humour needed as much place in the narrative as the serious details. Alex also noted that sexual assault can undermine feelings of self-worth, and male survivors often feel that their ‘masculinity’ has been undermined or degraded.
‘We associate words like bravery, courage, strength, with masculinity. But if it has those labels then it becomes inaccessible for ‘femininity’ […] it’s all toxic structure.’ Alex says.
This is where humour swoops in so elegantly – as a means by which to navigate through traumatic stress and grief, and allow for personal moments which release tensions rather than lock them away. ‘Masculine’ men are often perceived as having a sense of humour too.
‘There’s humour hiding in the darkest of places. I don’t think anyone has the stamina to go for 60 minutes without any funny bits,’ Alex explains as he outlines why there are scenes in Ripped that are light, funny, and absurd. ‘Humour has the ability to make serious things absurd’ Jonny echoes. As a comedian, humour is of course his key vehicle by which he entertains audiences and builds a narrative.
‘What comedy allows us to do is go, ‘isn’t this fucking crazy?’ If you’re serious about everything, you have to take the structures of things seriously – and then you have to argue within these confines. And that’s exhausting’
Jonny’s show is gag heavy, and he wants to challenge the ‘hushed tones, quiet room’ problem that exists around communicating abuse.
‘What I’d love, is if someone after the show could go, something like that happened to me, and someone else goes, oh shit, me too – and then they just allow the conversation to develop without it needing to be a hideous and soft conversation. Obviously, this stuff has a massive impact – but it doesn’t have to render you unable to function.’
For Jonny, this isn’t just about entertaining audiences. It’s also a way of challenging conceptions about abuse, and the way society confronts child abusers.
‘A paedophile is someone who is attracted to a child. A child abuser is someone who abuses a child. The action is the evil, not the thought. I think the guy who abused me probably hated himself.’
Jonny’s argument is that actions are criminal, and thoughts are not. British society bears a raw sense of anger and injustice around child abuse. Humour, perhaps strangely, is one of the best vehicles by which to position conversations on offending. In Jonny Pelham: Off Limits, he explains that a culture of silence is creating precisely the environment that allows a paedophile to become a child abuser:
‘Our current stance is ‘get rid of them, lock them up forever’, but that isn’t working. We are taking away opportunities for conversation. A lot of people resist the urges and never act on them. I think that is admirable.’
Creating artistic opportunities for audiences to engage with conversations about sexual abuse, child abuse, and male rape, is a complex and difficult challenge. Both Alex and Jonny told me that although the ‘survivor’s journey’ is a supportive and important narrative, it can simplify the entire conversation into a ‘before and after’ case study where survivors are perceived as in some way damaged. This means that, perversely, the stigma of the event can still exist within the language of ‘recovery’. Entertainment undoes this. It normalises stigmas. Performances on stage allow an audience to perceive performers not as victims, but as powerful owners of space in their own right.
Ultimately, when we entertain, nothing should be ‘off the table’. But the audience must be considered before launching into content that can be difficult to stomach. This is the responsibility of the creator or the creative team behind any work. Jonny wants his audience to laugh. Alex wants his audience to see the light as well as the darkness. At the end of the day, they both want to entertain whilst re-framing society’s image of ‘the victim’ or ‘the survivor’.
As Jonny says, ‘One of the things I’m saying is, I’m fine – or as fine as anyone can be.’
Jonny Pelham's new stand up show ‘Off Limits' will be at the Just The Tonic Caves –
Just Out Of The Box at 3.20pm from 1st – 25th August
.
Ripped runs until 25th August at Underbelly
Cowgate – Belly Laugh, 13:00
